Walking Fashion Fail: Miley Cyrus Edition! I have to say that I personally do admire a lot of things about Miley Cyrus (especially her current net worth. The girl makes more than most teen stars, Selena Gomez, Demi Lovato and Miranda Cosgrove included... in fact, Justin Bieber is the one who's currently raking in just as much as Miss Cyrus, with his girlfriend running a close third.), including her music and her perseverance and her ability to stay in the Hollywood grind for years, but some of her choices over the years, both wardrobe and otherwise, have definitely been questionable. But of course, teenage years are the time to make questionable choices and get away with them, but for now, lets take a look at what some of Miss Cyrus' most questionable off-stage style choices have been.
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I think I have to start with one of the worst of them all. Miley definitely went the Britney Spears route with this unfortunate crotch shot. Perez Hilton, famous gossip blogger, actually came under a major blitz of fire for uploading this picture of a then-minor - Miley was only 17-years-old at the time this photo was snapped. Perez's photo was blasted as being child pornography, as Miley chose to forgo her underwear and her private bits were very clearly on display in the original picture. The gossip website subsequently took the offending photo down, but blacked out versions have been circulating the web ever since. This is definitely a repeat lesson: going pantyless is NEVER an option, and crotch shots are offensive, disturbing and career-destroying (unless Playboy is the eventual goal). Paps should know better than to assault our eyes with such photos, but celebrities like Miley or Britney should know better than to step out sans underwear. I apologize if anyone was offended by the picture, but I can't sugarcoat the truth; it is what it is!
You can argue all you want that this, to the left, is a dress worn by Miss Cyrus; I still say that she forgot her pants on the red carpet. Props to her for her makeup though; the clean, minimalist look is very elegant and chic, and makes 
Miley look grown-up in a classy way.
Below: Um, wow. I have no words for this. First of all, what is it with celebs exposing all when getting out of their cars?! That shot is verging on capturing Miley's vajay-jay once again, and that's something we most definitely do not need to see. Enough with the crotch shots, please. (Is it just me, or does she look oddly thin - especially her legs -in this shot?) Secondly: Please, for the love of all that is couture, repeat after me: Tights/Leggings ARE NOT PANTS. And those teeny-tiny shorts that look like underwear really do not make the situation any better. Pants have NEVER been optional, and this fact has really got to stop being a repeat offender. Lastly... that's not a rip in the side of her dirty-looking T-shirt. That's a deliberate cut with clean edges, not an accidental hole. That deliberate cut exposes a whole lot of side-boob and underwiring. I have to wonder whether this was Miss Cyrus' intention as a plea for more attention, or whether she just likes the exposed look. Either way, this outfit just needs to be burned immediately.
This t-shirt below was exhibited by Miley while out to a casual lunch in LA with her mother and sister, Tish and Noah respectively. Clearly, Miley opted to go braless in the heat, which can be a very practical and classy idea, but Miley managed to take it straight through classy to trashy with her nipples so obviously poking through the thin white tee. Apparently she was oblivious to the stares of passerby, too. I don't actually get the cut shoulders, either. What I can't believe is that Mama Cyrus would actually be okay with this outfit, casual lunch or not. If I left the house with my nipples in plain view... well I don't think I'd actually ever do that, but my mother would so not be okay with it. Additionally, take a look at how 10-year-old Noah Cyrus seems to be taking style cues from her older sister:
This family photo was snapped during the same outing to lunch in LA. Miley's nips are slightly less obvious, and Mrs. Cyrus looks fairly decent, dressed up in black, but Noah Cyrus' black bra peeking out of her gray tank top is another matter entirely. It's a look that follows big sister Miley's style a little too closely, with the black bra playing peek-a-boo (is a 10-year-old even ready for a bra?!), and the slightly-more-decent-than-Miley's Daisy Dukes. How does Tish not seem to mind OR notice either of her daughters' attires?! One is only 10, for crying out loud... oh, wait. Maybe this is why Tish doesn't seem to mind:
Tish sure seems to enjoy dressing like an older version of Miley, instead of like an actual adult. I definitely understand that everyone has their sweatpants days, and Miley and Tish might be out on a casual coffee run or on their way back from the gym for all I know, but while Miley might be young enough to get away with a tank top and sweatpants in Hollywood's public eye, I don't think Tish should be awarded that same luxury. She should be dressing like a role model for Miley, not following Miley's style choices. However, it must be note
d that this outfit is overall not one of Miley's worst choices, and even Tish looks like a rather hot, though age-inappropriate mama. Miley's mom has got it goin' on!
Leather pants and LAX are a highly unflattering combination, and leather pants in general still do not qualify as pants. The leatherette hobo bag is actually pretty cute though.
If you read the T-shirt at the left carefully, you'll see "Cheap Trick" reprinted about half a dozen times. I don't quite understand why anyone would really advertise themselves as a cheap trick on or off-stage, but whatever floats Miley's boat. I'll admit she certainly looks "cheap" in this shirt -in all possible definitions of the word.
Tattered hose are still not pants, and Miley's too-short Daisy Dukes are BARELY, BARELY, BARELY visible beneath her surprisingly stylish and low-key plaid button-up. Her combat boots are cute too, but none of this makes up for the fact that Miley has apparently decided to treat the world as Pants: Optional (it sounds like something Chandler or Joey would say from Friends!!)
If it's cold enough to wear those chunky, fringed boots at the left, then it is definitely not hot enough for barely-visible Daisy Dukes. Miley sure commits a lot of Daisy Dukes infractions, doesn't she? Daisy Dukes can be super cute and flattering, but wear them wisely -not like Miley. Her hair looks cute, but that's about all that's forgivable. Please, girls: UGGS/any type of chunky boot + short shorts/miniskirt = NO. Her friend's crossbody bag is amazing, but those jeans/leggings overshot artfully hippie-ripped and went straight to homeless-looking. Props for the supportive "To Write Love On Her Arms" tee though - it's cute and chic, and for a cause. Bravo.
Miley seems to be taking a lot of performance cues from Miss Spears (I wonder if we'll see Miley lip-synch?), and while that on-stage outfit isn't really the craziest or most risque we've ever seen from performers (Lady Gaga's egg was insane), that's still got to be one hell of a wedgie... the wedgie that couldn't be tamed.
I'm actually on the fence about this look to the left.Yes, her black bra is peeking out of her white lace vest, and to be honest, a showing bra is nothing new for Cyrus, but this time I feel she pulls off the sheer look tastefully. The bra peeks out subtly, and does cover everything that needs to be covered up top. Black under white is actually a great color combination, and for once the Daisy Dukes aren't too, too short. The cutoffs even look great paired with brown country boots and minimal jewelry... all-in-all, this looks like a winning, casual summer outfit to me, though I know some people hate on the sheer look with bra peeking through. Sheer is all the rage these days though, so I say this look was of Miley's better choices.
The front of this ensemble doesn't look absolutely terrible. Sure, the paint-speckled jeans and the studded boots are a bit much, and definitely too visually distracting, but the front of the greyish-blue shirt at least looks elegant. The back however... YIKES. That's one Halloween project gone tragically, tragically wrong (cobwebs galore!) And I feel like it won't be too long before Miley Cyrus loses the clothes completely, and simply walks around in lingerie like Taylor Momsen.
Not only is such a lo
ng train (see below) entirely unnecessary on such a short dress, but it's also a major trip hazard. And the bow just makes the entire concoction look like some sort of melting ice cream cake, or a horrible '90s era prom bomb. The heels, however, are cute, and Miley otherwise looks sophisticated with her minimal makeup and flowing brown-blond hair. Too bad the dress is the main part of the ensemble, and that part simply failed to deliver.
This, to the right, is a wrapping paper mess. It looks like Miley was swallowed whole by Christmas wrapping paper, or by the colorful sticky glittery tape we used to decorate our school binders with. The mermaid-inspired bottom is fresh and youthful, but the the shiny ribbons of color simply fail to deliver a cohesive dress. To be fair, Miley looks much, much younger when this photo was taken at the Country Music Awards - she looks to be about 14, maybe 15, so her unfortunate style choice here can be chalked up to her age and therefore forgiven. However, hadn't Miley been doing Hannah Montana for years at this point? It would make sense, then, that Cyrus had a stylist... this fashion fail, I think, can be attributed to her stylist and not to Miley herself, since she was probably fairly new to the world of red carpet events.
Grandma Cyrus, what's good? That fur collar and matching hemline paired with the curtain-print dress just really does not work for me, and those orthopedic-looking shoes don't elevate the look from "dowdy" and "frumpy" much. Miley looks young here, but this time I think it's fair that she get penalized... this would've been an appropriate time to throw a diva fit and refuse to wear this dress in public. 
Love the shoes in the picture on the right, but is that a flower-embroidered gold-edged apron on top of her LBD? It looks more like a quirky French maid outfit than a dress befitting an appearance at a public event. Overall, the dress is confusing and has no discernible concept other than French Maid... Someone get the girl a stylist, on the double. Props to Miley for having a great, very natural looking tan though and beachy hair to complement the tan.
That, on the left, looks like a frilly tablecloth mess. Miley might have taken the concept of "Black Tie Affair" too far, and the menswear-inspired top half, with the undone bowtie and black accents doesn't pull the dress together in a flattering way. The high collar just doesn't work at all. The garment is overall shapeless and baggy, and the bottom half just looks like yards of lacy white tablecloth, not a dress.
This concludes another edition of Walking Fashion Fails! There are so many that I couldn't even pick a few favorite instances of Miley's epic fashion fails, so I had to include all of these. I'll throw out something positive next post with a celebrity who constantly looks chic, no matter the occasion, but at the end of the day it's important to remember that everyone messes up and makes style mistakes from time to time. However, when mistakes start repeating themselves too often, these mistakes become a choice, and some style faux-pas can't even be categorized as "mistakes" --making underwear optional is a choice.
Until next time, xo
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